ROUND THE WORLD TRIP:

Big hairy elephant (mammoth) post coming up...

Our first evening in Darwin (last Thursday) was spent at the Nimbil Market, home to hundreds of craft and food stalls, tens of hippies with bad dreadlocks and one fantastic didgereedoo player. In fact he was so good we even bought one of his CDs although, alas, not the Drum 'n' Bass one. After listening to didgeman for 20 mins or so and chomping on a pile of nachos as big as your house we bumped into Jason Gillespie - one of Australia's fast bowlers. He was in town for the test match against Bangladesh starting on Friday. I am pleased to report he looks as tall, ugly and gipsy-esque (Romanic?) in real life as he does on the telly. We retired early (bit like Bangladesh - an innings and 132 runs defeat - OUCH!) due to our early start. We were so bleary eyed that Jen took it upon herself to fall down the stairs, bruising and grazing her knees. 'These things always come in threes don't they...?' I thought...only to be proved spectacularly right in the course of the trip.

Our guide (Warren, or Wazza - pronounced 'Wozza', just as, I found out the other day, Wagga Wagga is pronounced 'Wogga Wogga') had been in and around Darwin for about 5 years and kind of sub-contracted himself to our tour company in that all the equipment, 4x4 et al were his. I thought I worked some hours in the past but it pales into insignificance for this guy as he gets up at 5, and starts work at 6 after typically finishing at around ten the night before...but as he said, whilst stood in the middle of the National Park, 'Yeah but just look at my office...' He was a good and knowledgable guide although occasionally he would floor us with 'facts' that were just plain wrong...e.g. 'The crocodile has a three-chambered heart - just like us', and the best - 'Go to the top of the hill for a full 380 degree panoramic view...'

After a few niggly bits of admin, park fees, sleeping bag hire and the like, we all crammed into Wazza's Landcruiser. Our group was quite well balanced - 3 accountants (Aussie early 40s Glen and his partner, early 30s Kate and Katherine, a South-African living in Britain), 3 recruiters (arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!! me (well, ex-recruiter), Zoe (later to be known as 'Dirty' Zoe and Rogelia - both of whom now live in Aus after immigrating from Wales (definitely NOT ENGLAND OK!!!!)and Portugal repectively) a doctor (Laurina, from Ontario), a dentist (Jen) and a mad Frenchman - Ben. We remarked that our group would be ultimately balanced if Ben was in a medical profession, and to our surprise when we asked us what he did he replied 'nursing'. We could hardly contain our glee until Ben qualified that in fact he was a student and actually did 'Nothing', just with a heavy French accent. So, off we went into the dust and towards Lichfield, stopping just once, briefly at magnetic termite mounds. These mounds are built from north to south (about 5 inches wide, but a couple of metres long) so that the termites get the sun in the morning on one side and the evening on the other - kind of like natures central heating I guess. Some were 50 years old and towered some 2 metres plus tall. On arriving at Wangi Falls we were ready to cool down and we took time out to swim across a lake (no cros here although, curiously, there were no locals, only tourists, swimming) to said falls before discovering that a car had been broken into in the car park and a couple had lost all their rings, passports, children, that kind of thing. Ever so slightly worried by the whole thing (we'd asked Wazza to lock the truck - his reply 'No-one ever breaks into vehicles here' meant he left it unlocked...) but returned to an untouched truck and trailer...I guess 'backpackers' never have much worth stealing anyway. After an hour or so it was time to move on to Tolmer and, subsequently, Florence Falls (down, and then back up, 160 steps...) where we also enjoyed the tropical whether with swim-time, but thankfully without 6 metre reptiles.

Only one really amusing incident happened during the day. Katherine (who was sitting next to Jen) got on the bus as I was talking to Glen and Kate. She reversed in (we were sitting on two benches of four - facing each other), and bent over to pick something up. I looked up to see this bum (covered in sarong) about 30 cms from my face and, convinced it was Jen (Jen evidently has a sarong & swimming cossie just like Katherine) went to give it a good pat. For some reason (maybe the look of horror on Kate and Geln's faces) I just made as if to before Katherine sat down and I flushed red in embarressment. God knows what would have happened if I had actually slapped her on the arse. Incidentally we had a good laugh about this later and she said afterwards if I had she would have elbowed my somewhere...)

The trip to the campsite followed, during which I was very careful to identify my wife before touching her knee, holding her hand etc... It was highly amusing to watch people do that little head slump thing when just drifting off to sleep. Every single time Laurina's head nearly touched the window of the bus she would sub-consciously correct her slump and her head would go back upright. Very strange but quite amusing nonetheless. Beer and bolognaise for tea which were both delicious. we decided against the tents (no mozzies in Lichfield for some reason) and, thus, slept in swags looking up at the stars. (Interestingly enough for me and my brother when we asked Ben how he felt as a percentage when he was flagging a little he said 57 and a half!!!!!)

Our (very) rude awakening came at 6 before we heading out towards Katherine Gorge where we spent half a day canoeing up and then back down. About halway up, we spent some time on our very own secluded beach before continuing on. There was a section at the end of the first gorge (there are 9 in total I think) where you could carry your canoe over 3 sets of (not very) rapids before carrying on to (you've guessed it) the second gorge. In the 35 degree heat we decided to watch the others and shout encouragement from the bank, and made it back around 20 minutes early. Laurina, Katherine, and Ben (paddling on his own) didn't get back until nearly an hour late meaning a change of plans - not all bad - we got to go to Katherine Thermal Spa
instead of another waterfall.

We finally entered Kakadu National Park after more driving (in total we drove more than 1000 kms over the four days, on dirt, 4x4 and normal roads), arriving at Barramundi Gorge (Maguk to the local aboriginals) campsite. After an uneventful night (remembered only for my toasted marshmallows, and Zoe's roasted bananas with chocolate) we got up early for the entertaining walk straight up a bloody big hill to the top plunge pool. There were, in fact, two main pools, with one other only accessible by diving and swimming into it or jumping in and then swimming out. Feeling brave (and-or foolhardy) we decided to jump off a couple of rocks some 4/5m high into the main pool. Jen decided to complete her second fall (quite spectacularly too it must be said) by slipping on the rock and grazing her backside whilst bouncing off the rock and into the water. Was this a (potentially) nasty accident or was she trying to give me something to help me differentiate her bum from others? Either way I'm pleased to report she didn't hurt herself physically (only her pride hurt) and what's more I got it on video!! This spot (despite Jen's Greg Louganis-esque fall) was our favourite of the whole trip - a real oasis in the tropics. Oh, and the fact that we didn't have to keep our eyes open for crocs as none of the buggers could ever climb up to those pools.

Jen decided to complete her sumersaulting triumverate with the most spectacular coming last - on the way to Jim Jim falls. Neither her, nor I, am 100% sure what happened other than after stubbing her toe on a tree root/stone/small mammal she ended up flipping over, and lying face up in some undergrowth. Considering the whole tracks was nasty looking rocks she was pretty fortunate to choose the only bush for a good km to land in. Nevertheless she now sports a bruise the size of a fist, but no longer sports the shorts she was wearing - they were ripped beyond further practical use. At Jim Jim we swam in the clear pool (not convinced there were no crocs here although I felt more convinced we were safe when Wazza dived in too) and spent a good couple of hours chatting to others in the group.

With a fridge full of beer it was inevitable that the final night would descent into some form of debauchery and it duly did. I think it is unfair to besmirch anyone's character on here (honest) but suffice to say it was during this evening, as the beer and wine flowed, that we gave Zoe her new moniker; 'Dirty' Zoe, she doesn't get that nickname from a lack of cleanliness you know! Without getting into too much detail she told us of her fascination for 'dirty men' (Robbie Williams and Colin Farrell are top of the tree, although Vin Diesel qualifies too apparently). This topic and line of conversation had most of us in stitches but not poor Ben, who by this time had consumed a couple of litres of red wine (well he did start at lunchtime) and was taking about half an hour to get a sentence out. We finished the night by trying to solve one of Zoe's men dilemmas for her by all chipping in our 2 cents of advice before finally getting to bed around midnight. It was a great night, as the seven of us (the two Aussies and Wazza slunk off to bed early) really gelled and had a great laugh.

With most of us feeling surprisingly refreshed we headed off, after breakfast, to the local Aboriginal Cultural Centre. I say most of us as Ben looked as though he was about to die. He muttered something about the steak being off or something and, feeling generous, we gave him the front seat (more leg room for him, less change of getting covered in vomit for us) for the duration of the day. The centre was similar to the one at Ayers Rock, although no 'scary-boob dance' this time round, but we'd seen enough after 30 mins or so and hurtled off to Ubirr rock, site of some of the oldest Aboriginal art (some say up to 22,000 years old) and a great view over the wetlands. With time running out all that was left was our crocodile cruise along the Corroboree Billabong. Our host, Ted, a straight talking late 50s Aussie, had to wait an hour or so for another group who'd suffered a flat tyre before setting out onto the water. The tour was fantastic - another highlight. Ted certainly knew his eco-system and treated us to an excellent commentary describing all the birds and other wildlife. However we'd all come for the crocs and they didn't disappoint. We must have seen 5 or 6 Freshies (smaller - not dangerous to humans unless provoked) and the same number of, the larger and much more menacing, Salties (they eat everything and anything - even their partners and offspring - these are the ones that killed a German tourist in Kakadu last year). Ted even managed to find what he believes could be the biggest recorded croc in the world - one 6 metres (over 19 feet) long. It swam on the surface some 10m in front of the boat for a minute or two before, rather ominously, deciding to submerge. At this point Ted hit the 'full throttle' button and we were out of there p.d.q. After a bit of fun with lotus flowers (leaves as hats - that kind of thing) we trapsed back into the van for one final drive back to Darwin. Never has a shower been more welcome (we hadn't had one since day one) and we must have scraped off accumulated dirt at least a millimetre deep.

The tour, guide, food, wildlife, sights, and people were fantastic. One of the most fun tours we've been on and definitely a great group of people. In fact, we all got on so well we're meeting up for more drinks and a Thai meal tonight before every one moves on. Who knows what revelations we'll get tonight...

We've spent the morning washing just about everything we own (that dust gets everywhere).

Whilst we've been away our collective sets of parents have been busy and it now looks likely that Richard, Lynn, and Rachel will be popping over (only 30 hours) to New Zealand to go skiing with us in September. Jen rang Lynn (her mum) last night and was so tired she could barely speak let alone sound excited, but, just in case they read this, Lynn, Richard Rachel - SHE IS - VERY!!! They should be booking something in the next day or two. However, my mum, stepdad and brother have all booked their tickets for New Year in Barcelona which, is also, great news.

Off to Perth on Thursday - we're in the process of arranging to meet up with Helen and Rich who arrived there yesterday. We should be able to spend some time diving with them on Ningaloo.

The following are a load of pictures some as far back as Brisbane/Aussie Zoo, and others from the recent trip.

Tasmanian Devil, sleeping koala - Aussie Zoo.